








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 430 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 182 matches | ||
| Faceit | 36 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 21 different maps





Our logs show 36 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




24 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3300 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 14,190 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4670 | 33% |
| Smokes | 3552 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 2839 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 3129 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,381,838 of utility $170 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 135 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mareen | 68% | 22 |
| #2 | Mega | 64% | 33 |
| #3 | Rodriguez | 63% | 43 |
| #4 | Neo | 61% | 23 |
| #5 | youu | 59% | 44 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ☁Snakehead2_1 | 9 | 0.0051 |
| #2 | Rodriguez | 9 | 0.0104 |
| #3 | hawoosin | 6 | 0.0059 |
| #4 | Solo | 5 | 0.0035 |
| #5 | DJ Trexx | 4 | 0.0022 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DJ Trexx | 385 | 0.21 | 10 min |
| #2 | ☁Snakehead2_1 | 332 | 0.19 | 11 min |
| #3 | Solo | 317 | 0.22 | 7 min |
| #4 | Ryutsa | 255 | 0.21 | 6 min |
| #5 | hawoosin | 171 | 0.17 | 4 min |





