








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1620 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 329 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 135 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 85 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 70 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 43 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 39 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 29 matches | ||
| Faceit | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 4 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 21 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




150 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
10703 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 27,747 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 9496 | 34% |
| Smokes | 6010 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 5931 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 6310 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,450,095 of utility $134 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 224 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | WOMBATS | 52% | 212 |
| #2 | whoisthis? | 52% | 193 |
| #3 | Brens | 50% | 199 |
| #4 | OzoneSpark | 49% | 55 |
| #5 | ++EdijsYo++ | 45% | 121 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mitinaax) | 210 | 0.0152 |
| #2 | Bananaboy | 35 | 0.0088 |
| #3 | Brens | 30 | 0.0074 |
| #4 | ++EdijsYo++ | 23 | 0.0091 |
| #5 | WOMBATS | 19 | 0.0044 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mitinaax) | 3196 | 0.23 | 76 min |
| #2 | whoisthis? | 595 | 0.15 | 14 min |
| #3 | Brens | 408 | 0.10 | 11 min |
| #4 | WOMBATS | 338 | 0.08 | 7 min |
| #5 | ++EdijsYo++ | 282 | 0.11 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Brens | +5.52 | 90 | 61 |
| #2 | whoisthis? | +2.84 | 78 | 62 |
| #3 | mitinaax) | +1.08 | 87 | 53 |
| #4 | TIP TOP | +1.05 | 75 | 64 |
| #5 | WOMBATS | +0.65 | 76 | 52 |





