








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 580 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 1455 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 50 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 41 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 20 matches | ||
| Faceit | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 4 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 58 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




59 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
16272 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 40,556 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 7165 | 18% |
| Smokes | 12983 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 11975 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 8433 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $5,764,571 of utility $163 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2709 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ++EdijsYo++ | 52% | 102 |
| #2 | TIP TOP | 52% | 212 |
| #3 | ✪Square✪ | 51% | 98 |
| #4 | mitinaax) | 51% | 210 |
| #5 | ♫♪ Kamika ♫♪ | 45% | 137 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ++EdijsYo++ | 52% | 102 |
| #2 | TIP TOP | 52% | 212 |
| #3 | ✪Square✪ | 51% | 98 |
| #4 | mitinaax) | 51% | 210 |
| #5 | ♫♪ Kamika ♫♪ | 45% | 137 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mitinaax) | 79 | 0.0186 |
| #2 | TIP TOP | 38 | 0.0089 |
| #3 | ✪Square✪ | 11 | 0.0053 |
| #4 | ++EdijsYo++ | 9 | 0.0040 |
| #5 | ♫♪ Kamika ♫♪ | 3 | 0.0010 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mitinaax) | 1103 | 0.26 | 25 min |
| #2 | TIP TOP | 688 | 0.16 | 17 min |
| #3 | ♫♪ Kamika ♫♪ | 376 | 0.13 | 8 min |
| #4 | ✪Square✪ | 360 | 0.17 | 8 min |
| #5 | ++EdijsYo++ | 224 | 0.10 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪Square✪ | +3.14 | 88 | 62 |
| #2 | TIP TOP | +1.74 | 79 | 64 |
| #3 | mitinaax) | +1.67 | 87 | 51 |
| #4 | WOMBATS | +0.39 | 77 | 52 |
| #5 | ++EdijsYo++ | +0.19 | 81 | 55 |





