








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 773 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 431 matches | ||
| Premier | 150 matches | ||
| Wingman | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 20 different maps





Our logs show 37 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




13 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6117 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 25,132 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 7590 | 30% |
| Smokes | 7390 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 2706 | 11% |
| Molotovs | 7446 | 30% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,186,324 of utility $147 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 78 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #11 | Minze™ | 46% | 109 |
| #12 | Zimfex | 45% | 86 |
| #13 | RiSE_PfaNnE | 45% | 73 |
| #14 | mofa | 45% | 69 |
| #15 | syno | 44% | 154 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | wessywes | 6 | 0.0014 |
| #2 | syno | 4 | 0.0012 |
| #3 | Ki77e | 4 | 0.0015 |
| #4 | colaguy2011 | 3 | 0.0006 |
| #5 | Minze™ | 3 | 0.0013 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | colaguy2011 | 1118 | 0.21 | 29 min |
| #2 | wessywes | 884 | 0.21 | 25 min |
| #3 | syno | 629 | 0.19 | 20 min |
| #4 | M.A.D.D. | 374 | 0.08 | 8 min |
| #5 | mofa | 315 | 0.21 | 9 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sinoxxy | +1.57 | 62 | 70 |
| #2 | colaguy2011 | +0.86 | 59 | 72 |
| #3 | Minze™ | +0.78 | 69 | 66 |
| #4 | wessywes | +0.76 | 82 | 68 |
| #5 | Zimfex | +0.44 | 69 | 56 |





