








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 4 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 73 matches | ||
| Faceit | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1354 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,191 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1732 | 28% |
| Smokes | 1621 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 1565 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 1273 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $153,700 of utility $49 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | RaK | 55% | 11 |
| #2 | Gebrochen | 48% | 27 |
| #3 | Bilchmann1 | 47% | 129 |
| #4 | grrrrr törken | 46% | 84 |
| #5 | [türkiye = TROLL] mr. bigspin | 43% | 51 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | RaK | 55% | 11 |
| #2 | Gebrochen | 48% | 27 |
| #3 | Bilchmann1 | 47% | 129 |
| #4 | grrrrr törken | 46% | 84 |
| #5 | [türkiye = TROLL] mr. bigspin | 43% | 51 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bilchmann1 | 23 | 0.0091 |
| #2 | [türkiye = TROLL] mr. bigspin | 19 | 0.0195 |
| #3 | Gebrochen | 11 | 0.0198 |
| #4 | grrrrr törken | 6 | 0.0035 |
| #5 | RaK | 1 | 0.0049 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bilchmann1 | 347 | 0.14 | 7 min |
| #2 | grrrrr törken | 203 | 0.12 | 5 min |
| #3 | [türkiye = TROLL] mr. bigspin | 171 | 0.18 | 3 min |
| #4 | Gebrochen | 31 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| #5 | RaK | 16 | 0.08 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | RaK | +3.63 | 74 | 49 |
| #2 | Bilchmann1 | +1.21 | 69 | 55 |
| #3 | Seikei | -0.25 | 54 | 67 |
| #4 | grrrrr törken | -0.49 | 71 | 61 |
| #5 | [türkiye = TROLL] mr. bigspin | -0.86 | 47 | 47 |





