








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 686 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 229 matches | ||
| Faceit | 115 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 16 matches | ||
| Wingman | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 10 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




28 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7166 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 21,547 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6514 | 30% |
| Smokes | 5121 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 4185 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 5727 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,438,254 of utility $126 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 732 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sean cs.money | 72% | 159 |
| #2 | ʻO Noa ke aliʻi | 69% | 29 |
| #3 | akaydia | 65% | 43 |
| #4 | Jolts | 64% | 211 |
| #5 | Krabs | 59% | 217 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jolts | 22 | 0.0049 |
| #2 | ZachSchmitty | 22 | 0.0052 |
| #3 | sean cs.money | 19 | 0.0057 |
| #4 | User1_Max | 8 | 0.0028 |
| #5 | Krabs | 7 | 0.0016 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Krabs | 972 | 0.23 | 25 min |
| #2 | sean cs.money | 961 | 0.29 | 30 min |
| #3 | ZachSchmitty | 715 | 0.17 | 17 min |
| #4 | Jolts | 530 | 0.12 | 16 min |
| #5 | User1_Max | 431 | 0.15 | 10 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jolts | +2.77 | 89 | 55 |
| #2 | twistzz to FaZe | +2.64 | 81 | 67 |
| #3 | Krabs | +1.71 | 85 | 63 |
| #4 | ʻO Noa ke aliʻi | +1.65 | 93 | 57 |
| #5 | Krels | +1.10 | 86 | 62 |





