








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 925 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 583 matches | ||
| Wingman | 455 matches | ||
| Esplay | 109 matches | 1,523 | |
| Competitive Mirage | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Faceit | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 22 different maps





Our logs show 77 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




110 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
8180 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 22,301 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4330 | 19% |
| Smokes | 4639 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 7364 | 33% |
| Molotovs | 5968 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $4,369,269 of utility $188 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 4536 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | onedinkツ | 33 | 0.0026 |
| #2 | Pezzond | 15 | 0.0095 |
| #3 | Elofiten | 12 | 0.0034 |
| #4 | shalle | 9 | 0.0027 |
| #5 | Nicke2006 | 7 | 0.0034 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Nicke2006 | +3.87 | 83 | 49 |
| #2 | zutt$ esPortaler | +2.24 | 72 | 38 |
| #3 | shalle | +1.74 | 90 | 26 |
| #4 | onedinkツ | +1.20 | 65 | 62 |
| #5 | Pumba ツ | -0.20 | 73 | 48 |





