








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 795 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 386 matches | ||
| Wingman | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 36 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




13 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4516 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 16,422 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3512 | 21% |
| Smokes | 3519 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 5769 | 35% |
| Molotovs | 3622 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,569,840 of utility $160 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 198 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 4llwaysBad | 58% | 84 |
| #2 | zezzelele | 55% | 44 |
| #3 | lartza | 54% | 70 |
| #4 | Noa!m | 54% | 127 |
| #5 | ★Peltzi★ | 53% | 32 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #13 | Spesiaali | 44% | 171 |
| #14 | JerzND | 43% | 89 |
| #15 | RUMPPO | 43% | 61 |
| #16 | NyyTTi ToPi =DDd | 41% | 61 |
| #17 | ບາງຄັ້ງດີ | 38% | 24 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 4llwaysBad | 7 | 0.0040 |
| #2 | RUMPPO | 6 | 0.0045 |
| #3 | ♿Tsekkipiiska♿ | 5 | 0.0012 |
| #4 | Spesiaali | 5 | 0.0014 |
| #5 | Noa!m | 4 | 0.0014 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Henkisesti silver | 583 | 0.08 | 18 min |
| #2 | Spesiaali | 539 | 0.15 | 11 min |
| #3 | Pixelrat | 502 | 0.20 | 16 min |
| #4 | ♿Tsekkipiiska♿ | 384 | 0.10 | 12 min |
| #5 | 4llwaysBad | 375 | 0.22 | 9 min |





