








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 888 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 248 matches | ||
| Wingman | 115 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 57 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 53 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 44 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 22 different maps





Our logs show 66 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




26 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6988 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,536 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2253 | 17% |
| Smokes | 4023 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 3947 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 3313 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $3,658,207 of utility $246 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 68 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MONEY | 52% | 90 |
| #2 | SocialistSamurai | 51% | 470 |
| #3 | c0bra | 50% | 222 |
| #4 | Z£D ♚ | 47% | 85 |
| #5 | hyvoltagex3y | 46% | 185 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SocialistSamurai | 657 | 0.07 | 13 min |
| #2 | c0bra | 387 | 0.09 | 8 min |
| #3 | Z£D ♚ | 212 | 0.13 | 5 min |
| #4 | hyvoltagex3y | 171 | 0.05 | 4 min |
| #5 | Xtrellah | 108 | 0.02 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Z£D ♚ | +2.89 | 61 | 66 |
| #2 | SocialistSamurai | +2.23 | 61 | 60 |
| #3 | c0bra | +1.57 | 57 | 45 |
| #4 | Orb Hunter | +1.39 | 75 | 47 |
| #5 | MONEY | -2.54 | 25 | 17 |





