








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 31 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Train | 37 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 20 matches | ||
| Premier | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 11 matches | ||
| Faceit | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2181 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,310 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2155 | 29% |
| Smokes | 1303 | 18% |
| HE Grenades | 2787 | 38% |
| Molotovs | 1065 | 15% |
Our logs show you have wasted $394,740 of utility $65 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 82 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | everyones favorite dog | 53% | 60 |
| #2 | Possibly a Bully | 49% | 43 |
| #3 | ♡ Soulidity ♡ | 47% | 17 |
| #4 | melody | 46% | 54 |
| #5 | LYNN | 46% | 243 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MothMan | 6 | 0.0028 |
| #2 | etalS | 4 | 0.0014 |
| #3 | everyones favorite dog | 4 | 0.0041 |
| #4 | LYNN | 2 | 0.0004 |
| #5 | otter | 2 | 0.0006 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | LYNN | 807 | 0.17 | 17 min |
| #2 | otter | 662 | 0.19 | 14 min |
| #3 | repinuj | 508 | 0.27 | 11 min |
| #4 | MothMan | 501 | 0.23 | 12 min |
| #5 | etalS | 445 | 0.15 | 10 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ♡ Soulidity ♡ | +4.76 | 80 | 54 |
| #2 | Possibly a Bully | +3.16 | 90 | 48 |
| #3 | otter | +2.56 | 69 | 57 |
| #4 | everyones favorite dog | +1.36 | 56 | 51 |
| #5 | melody | +1.01 | 54 | 55 |





