








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 381 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wingman | 226 matches | ||
| Premier | 75 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 19 different maps





Our logs show 4 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




16 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2742 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,433 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 349 | 24% |
| Smokes | 411 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 347 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 326 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $342,242 of utility $39 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 103 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Conquest | 54% | 127 |
| #2 | Vandit | 50% | 193 |
| #3 | Scum Prophet | 48% | 292 |
| #4 | TexasEddy | 46% | 236 |
| #5 | Lalauren123 | 41% | 111 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Vandit | 50% | 193 |
| #3 | Scum Prophet | 48% | 292 |
| #4 | TexasEddy | 46% | 236 |
| #5 | Lalauren123 | 41% | 111 |
| #6 | I ♡ E-Girls | 37% | 150 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Vandit | 8 | 0.0024 |
| #2 | Scum Prophet | 5 | 0.0009 |
| #3 | I ♡ E-Girls | 5 | 0.0017 |
| #4 | Conquest | 5 | 0.0021 |
| #5 | TexasEddy | 4 | 0.0009 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Scum Prophet | 689 | 0.13 | 14 min |
| #2 | I ♡ E-Girls | 497 | 0.17 | 13 min |
| #3 | Vandit | 203 | 0.06 | 4 min |
| #4 | TexasEddy | 169 | 0.04 | 4 min |
| #5 | Conquest | 97 | 0.04 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Conquest | +1.95 | 59 | 29 |
| #2 | Vandit | +1.46 | 61 | 55 |
| #3 | TexasEddy | +0.85 | 42 | 57 |
| #4 | Sprinkles | +0.40 | 35 | 15 |
| #5 | I ♡ E-Girls | -0.38 | 52 | 48 |





