








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 182 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Nuke | 105 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 68 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 50 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 43 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 13 matches | ||
| Premier | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 28 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




39 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3429 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,236 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2435 | 30% |
| Smokes | 982 | 12% |
| HE Grenades | 3679 | 45% |
| Molotovs | 1140 | 14% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,541,700 of utility $188 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 114 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jerry | 64% | 25 |
| #2 | tofu🍓 | 55% | 167 |
| #3 | Mylo | 49% | 196 |
| #4 | mmmm.. | 49% | 69 |
| #5 | subu | 49% | 189 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | sippin hrtea | 43% | 21 |
| #8 | pet femboy | 42% | 71 |
| #9 | JD | 35% | 23 |
| #10 | youtube.com/damlox | 34% | 50 |
| #11 | jack | 26% | 31 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mylo | 22 | 0.0056 |
| #2 | subu | 15 | 0.0040 |
| #3 | tofu🍓 | 14 | 0.0042 |
| #4 | pet femboy | 14 | 0.0099 |
| #5 | týssy | 13 | 0.0033 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mylo | 260 | 0.07 | 6 min |
| #2 | tofu🍓 | 201 | 0.06 | 5 min |
| #3 | týssy | 106 | 0.03 | 3 min |
| #4 | JD | 59 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| #5 | sippin hrtea | 51 | 0.13 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | týssy | +5.66 | 91 | 37 |
| #2 | jerry | +4.99 | 89 | 37 |
| #3 | mmmm.. | +1.14 | 85 | 33 |
| #4 | pet femboy | +0.33 | 82 | 20 |
| #5 | JD | +0.19 | 60 | 64 |





