








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 893 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Nuke | 382 matches | ||
| Premier | 287 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 110 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 49 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 36 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 4 matches | ||
| Faceit | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 17 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




112 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
8344 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 34,156 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5915 | 17% |
| Smokes | 8296 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 11121 | 33% |
| Molotovs | 8824 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,188,936 of utility $95 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1607 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | týssy | 53% | 352 |
| #2 | subu | 50% | 663 |
| #3 | tofu🍓 | 50% | 315 |
| #4 | Stèfàn | 49% | 196 |
| #5 | pet femboy | 49% | 232 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Stèfàn | 49% | 196 |
| #5 | pet femboy | 49% | 232 |
| #6 | JD | 46% | 107 |
| #7 | mmmm.. | 45% | 266 |
| #8 | jack | 30% | 66 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | subu | 59 | 0.0045 |
| #2 | pet femboy | 41 | 0.0092 |
| #3 | mmmm.. | 37 | 0.0068 |
| #4 | tofu🍓 | 36 | 0.0057 |
| #5 | týssy | 21 | 0.0029 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | tofu🍓 | 326 | 0.05 | 9 min |
| #2 | JD | 287 | 0.13 | 8 min |
| #3 | Stèfàn | 243 | 0.06 | 5 min |
| #4 | subu | 234 | 0.02 | 6 min |
| #5 | týssy | 177 | 0.02 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | týssy | +5.74 | 91 | 35 |
| #2 | pet femboy | +1.41 | 85 | 18 |
| #3 | mmmm.. | +0.75 | 84 | 26 |
| #4 | jack | +0.17 | 69 | 39 |
| #5 | subu | -0.07 | 72 | 20 |





