








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 203 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 12 matches | ||
| Premier | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 8 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1077 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,798 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 305 | 11% |
| Smokes | 633 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 744 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 1116 | 40% |
Our logs show you have wasted $703,769 of utility $228 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 44 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Wolfies | 67% | 12 |
| #2 | Elekunmulukku | 41% | 39 |
| #3 | Kumivene Soodu | 40% | 112 |
| #4 | Matias | 39% | 46 |
| #5 | JackMoonShine | 38% | 8 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | VitunJulle | 10 | 0.0044 |
| #2 | Kumivene Soodu | 9 | 0.0040 |
| #3 | pomppy | 8 | 0.0044 |
| #4 | Matias | 4 | 0.0048 |
| #5 | Tikutti | 1 | 0.0040 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | VitunJulle | 525 | 0.23 | 15 min |
| #2 | pomppy | 209 | 0.12 | 6 min |
| #3 | Elekunmulukku | 106 | 0.15 | 2 min |
| #4 | Kumivene Soodu | 93 | 0.04 | 2 min |
| #5 | Matias | 81 | 0.10 | 2 min |





