








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 3022 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 473 matches | ||
| Premier | 343 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 253 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 226 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 184 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 146 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 132 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 98 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 90 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 83 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 63 matches | ||
| Wingman | 47 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 5 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 22 different maps





Our logs show 108 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




138 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
19956 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 66,769 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 18086 | 27% |
| Smokes | 19697 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 18258 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 10728 | 16% |
Our logs show you have wasted $7,084,030 of utility $156 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2907 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | taco bell victim | 63% | 168 |
| #2 | Mr.NiceGuy | 61% | 147 |
| #3 | Levi | 52% | 620 |
| #4 | Archetype | 51% | 276 |
| #5 | lonely | 48% | 130 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | taco bell victim | 71 | 0.0210 |
| #2 | Bobert | 57 | 0.0068 |
| #3 | Levi | 56 | 0.0045 |
| #4 | Tee | 47 | 0.0033 |
| #5 | Hero_Elementz | 30 | 0.0031 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bobert | 835 | 0.10 | 19 min |
| #2 | Tee | 629 | 0.04 | 15 min |
| #3 | Levi | 585 | 0.05 | 12 min |
| #4 | taco bell victim | 507 | 0.15 | 10 min |
| #5 | SNOW | 198 | 0.05 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mr.NiceGuy | +4.99 | 68 | 63 |
| #2 | taco bell victim | +4.57 | 56 | 57 |
| #3 | lonely | +2.37 | 75 | 11 |
| #4 | tang | +1.96 | 79 | 70 |
| #5 | Hero_Elementz | +1.81 | 40 | 27 |





