










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 143 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 404 matches | ||
| Premier | 52 matches | ||
| Wingman | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 11 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5340 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 24,039 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 7145 | 30% |
| Smokes | 6306 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 4333 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 6255 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $655,582 of utility $57 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1130 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | HAL 9000 | 59% | 61 |
| #2 | Puikula | 58% | 50 |
| #3 | stulth | 57% | 146 |
| #4 | TofiB [Chillaa baskaks] | 57% | 120 |
| #5 | hebduL | 56% | 78 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | higu | 54% | 111 |
| #9 | JoniMaisema | 54% | 152 |
| #10 | Sväne | 51% | 290 |
| #11 | |Kyrpex| | 48% | 56 |
| #12 | matte | 46% | 37 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | gubbe | 7 | 0.0011 |
| #2 | Sväne | 5 | 0.0008 |
| #3 | higu | 5 | 0.0020 |
| #4 | -Mel Gibson- | 4 | 0.0012 |
| #5 | stulth | 2 | 0.0006 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sväne | 1312 | 0.21 | 44 min |
| #2 | TofiB [Chillaa baskaks] | 403 | 0.15 | 11 min |
| #3 | gubbe | 388 | 0.06 | 10 min |
| #4 | hebduL | 386 | 0.22 | 10 min |
| #5 | -Mel Gibson- | 341 | 0.11 | 8 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | gubbe | +3.00 | 82 | 57 |
| #2 | TofiB [Chillaa baskaks] | +1.35 | 68 | 69 |
| #3 | hebduL | +0.59 | 75 | 63 |
| #4 | Tzone | +0.38 | 80 | 67 |
| #5 | -Mel Gibson- | +0.22 | 61 | 59 |





