








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 461 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 147 matches | ||
| Faceit | 60 matches | ||
| Wingman | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 21 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3762 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,255 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1158 | 19% |
| Smokes | 1599 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 1433 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 2065 | 33% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,184,433 of utility $198 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 369 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | angeL | 67% | 58 |
| #2 | devu | 63% | 49 |
| #3 | Marss hellcase.com | 63% | 32 |
| #4 | Jag | 60% | 156 |
| #5 | S3TUP | 60% | 188 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | S3TUP | 60% | 188 |
| #6 | Ralph | 39% | 18 |
| #7 | Heffe | 39% | 18 |
| #8 | b l u e | 35% | 20 |
| #9 | Rusty | 19% | 16 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | S3TUP | 8 | 0.0021 |
| #2 | Jag | 7 | 0.0022 |
| #3 | devu | 3 | 0.0028 |
| #4 | angeL | 1 | 0.0008 |
| #5 | b l u e | 1 | 0.0023 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | S3TUP | 1236 | 0.32 | 38 min |
| #2 | Jag | 298 | 0.09 | 8 min |
| #3 | devu | 185 | 0.17 | 5 min |
| #4 | angeL | 146 | 0.12 | 4 min |
| #5 | b l u e | 63 | 0.14 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kobra | +2.95 | 94 | 59 |
| #2 | angeL | +0.49 | 78 | 69 |
| #3 | Jag | +0.42 | 80 | 43 |
| #4 | Ralph | +0.41 | 89 | 64 |
| #5 | S3TUP | +0.41 | 71 | 82 |





