








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 52 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 111 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Wingman | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 9 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




13 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1079 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,928 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1651 | 34% |
| Smokes | 870 | 18% |
| HE Grenades | 1433 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 974 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $422,433 of utility $128 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 73 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sp4rx | 53% | 15 |
| #2 | DaGreatCake | 45% | 137 |
| #3 | CamoBrie | 42% | 128 |
| #4 | Pug | 42% | 112 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sp4rx | 53% | 15 |
| #2 | DaGreatCake | 45% | 137 |
| #3 | CamoBrie | 42% | 128 |
| #4 | Pug | 42% | 112 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pug | 10 | 0.0044 |
| #2 | DaGreatCake | 7 | 0.0025 |
| #3 | CamoBrie | 1 | 0.0004 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pug | 212 | 0.09 | 6 min |
| #2 | CamoBrie | 158 | 0.06 | 3 min |
| #3 | DaGreatCake | 117 | 0.04 | 3 min |
| #4 | sp4rx | 15 | 0.05 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pug | +3.09 | 79 | 72 |
| #2 | CamoBrie | -0.60 | 64 | 54 |
| #3 | sp4rx | -0.78 | 76 | 55 |
| #4 | DaGreatCake | -1.09 | 66 | 41 |
| #5 | Crames | -1.47 | 67 | 53 |





