








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 349 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 273 matches | ||
| Wingman | 57 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 39 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




14 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3174 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,873 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 779 | 13% |
| Smokes | 717 | 12% |
| HE Grenades | 3171 | 54% |
| Molotovs | 1206 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,867,006 of utility $239 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1165 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sp4rx | 55% | 20 |
| #2 | Pug | 48% | 170 |
| #3 | CamoBrie | 47% | 316 |
| #4 | Crames | 45% | 137 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sp4rx | 55% | 20 |
| #2 | Pug | 48% | 170 |
| #3 | CamoBrie | 47% | 316 |
| #4 | Crames | 45% | 137 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | CamoBrie | 13 | 0.0021 |
| #2 | Pug | 13 | 0.0037 |
| #3 | Crames | 9 | 0.0032 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Crames | 447 | 0.16 | 9 min |
| #2 | CamoBrie | 340 | 0.05 | 8 min |
| #3 | Pug | 315 | 0.09 | 9 min |
| #4 | sp4rx | 21 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pug | +3.28 | 77 | 68 |
| #2 | CamoBrie | -0.16 | 66 | 52 |
| #3 | sp4rx | -0.73 | 75 | 55 |
| #4 | DaGreatCake | -1.13 | 67 | 41 |
| #5 | Crames | -1.43 | 65 | 54 |





