








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 120 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 21 different maps





Our logs show 3 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




32 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
814 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,399 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 882 | 26% |
| Smokes | 949 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 688 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 880 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $326,308 of utility $142 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 126 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ace | 60% | 10 |
| #2 | BALD PEEK Slime | 57% | 7 |
| #3 | Lt. piiko | 56% | 94 |
| #4 | Pinke | 54% | 52 |
| #5 | Koffi | 50% | 14 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ace | 60% | 10 |
| #2 | BALD PEEK Slime | 57% | 7 |
| #3 | Lt. piiko | 56% | 94 |
| #4 | Pinke | 54% | 52 |
| #5 | Koffi | 50% | 14 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lt. piiko | 12 | 0.0067 |
| #2 | Pinke | 3 | 0.0030 |
| #3 | Koffi | 3 | 0.0098 |
| #4 | Ace | 2 | 0.0102 |
| #5 | BALD PEEK Slime | 1 | 0.0067 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lt. piiko | 209 | 0.12 | 5 min |
| #2 | Pinke | 43 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| #3 | Koffi | 24 | 0.08 | 0 min |
| #4 | Ace | 19 | 0.10 | 0 min |
| #5 | BALD PEEK Slime | 8 | 0.05 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ace | +5.29 | 93 | 66 |
| #2 | Lt. piiko | +2.93 | 76 | 59 |
| #3 | Koffi | +2.04 | 84 | 42 |
| #4 | Pinke | +0.99 | 91 | 42 |
| #5 | Lore | +0.21 | 73 | 50 |





