








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 445 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 185 matches | ||
| Faceit | 156 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 62 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




18 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4482 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 16,592 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5717 | 34% |
| Smokes | 3857 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 4166 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 2852 | 17% |
Our logs show you have wasted $982,752 of utility $104 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 683 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪k0z1y | 58% | 31 |
| #2 | MikeyDunkz | 56% | 108 |
| #3 | skews | 56% | 288 |
| #4 | faux | 52% | 23 |
| #5 | ZarkO | 52% | 25 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | hoaX** | 51% | 68 |
| #7 | rekrowthgil | 49% | 49 |
| #8 | tapdatass | 43% | 113 |
| #9 | Megaman | 43% | 67 |
| #10 | Miggie | 41% | 39 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | skews | 11 | 0.0018 |
| #2 | faux | 2 | 0.0043 |
| #3 | MikeyDunkz | 1 | 0.0004 |
| #4 | Megaman | 1 | 0.0007 |
| #5 | rekrowthgil | 1 | 0.0009 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | skews | 1142 | 0.19 | 32 min |
| #2 | MikeyDunkz | 266 | 0.11 | 7 min |
| #3 | tapdatass | 257 | 0.11 | 6 min |
| #4 | hoaX** | 105 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| #5 | Megaman | 103 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | rekrowthgil | +2.08 | 68 | 62 |
| #2 | ikkon | +1.58 | 76 | 64 |
| #3 | ZarkO | +1.43 | 52 | 70 |
| #4 | ✪k0z1y | +1.24 | 52 | 66 |
| #5 | MikeyDunkz | +0.40 | 67 | 64 |





