








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 333 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 189 matches | ||
| Faceit | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 31 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2851 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,468 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2009 | 27% |
| Smokes | 1988 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 1624 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 1847 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $987,954 of utility $177 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 10 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 4Tr1X | 61% | 31 |
| #2 | Stryd | 54% | 59 |
| #3 | SturmS | 54% | 168 |
| #4 | der Lehrling | 52% | 173 |
| #5 | der Boss | 52% | 56 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Stryd | 54% | 59 |
| #3 | SturmS | 54% | 168 |
| #4 | der Lehrling | 52% | 173 |
| #5 | der Boss | 52% | 56 |
| #6 | m. | 40% | 15 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SturmS | 12 | 0.0033 |
| #2 | der Lehrling | 7 | 0.0018 |
| #3 | der Boss | 4 | 0.0031 |
| #4 | Stryd | 4 | 0.0032 |
| #5 | 4Tr1X | 2 | 0.0029 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | der Lehrling | 390 | 0.10 | 12 min |
| #2 | Stryd | 100 | 0.08 | 3 min |
| #3 | der Boss | 84 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| #4 | SturmS | 62 | 0.02 | 2 min |
| #5 | 4Tr1X | 16 | 0.02 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Stoly | +2.65 | 86 | 61 |
| #2 | Stryd | +0.36 | 82 | 64 |
| #3 | der Lehrling | -0.48 | 62 | 73 |
| #4 | SturmS | -0.92 | 76 | 40 |
| #5 | 4Tr1X | -1.06 | 67 | 46 |





