








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 699 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 44 matches | ||
| Faceit | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 19 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1417 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,543 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 498 | 20% |
| Smokes | 408 | 16% |
| HE Grenades | 926 | 36% |
| Molotovs | 711 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $649,343 of utility $268 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 119 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Shebo | 63% | 8 |
| #2 | Granny | 54% | 46 |
| #3 | Gex | 54% | 50 |
| #4 | Pint4r | 53% | 51 |
| #5 | MaXiKinG | 52% | 21 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Shebo | 63% | 8 |
| #2 | Granny | 54% | 46 |
| #3 | Gex | 54% | 50 |
| #4 | Pint4r | 53% | 51 |
| #5 | MaXiKinG | 52% | 21 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Gex | 8 | 0.0075 |
| #2 | Pint4r | 6 | 0.0055 |
| #3 | Granny | 5 | 0.0052 |
| #4 | Shebo | 2 | 0.0125 |
| #5 | MaXiKinG | 1 | 0.0023 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pint4r | 267 | 0.24 | 7 min |
| #2 | Granny | 244 | 0.25 | 6 min |
| #3 | Gex | 120 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| #4 | MaXiKinG | 103 | 0.24 | 3 min |
| #5 | Shebo | 35 | 0.22 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pint4r | +2.92 | 86 | 73 |
| #2 | Shebo | +2.51 | 84 | 68 |
| #3 | Granny | +1.49 | 86 | 69 |
| #4 | MaXiKinG | +1.11 | 81 | 64 |
| #5 | lolihop | +1.09 | 89 | 45 |





