








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 440 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 166 matches | ||
| Faceit | 108 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 11 matches | ||
| Wingman | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 3 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




38 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4511 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,834 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2516 | 26% |
| Smokes | 3081 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 1510 | 15% |
| Molotovs | 2727 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,225,410 of utility $163 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 185 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | GhostRob | 61% | 36 |
| #2 | flairr | 56% | 52 |
| #3 | oomi | 55% | 31 |
| #4 | yeji | 53% | 43 |
| #5 | Exzotikk(LFT) | 53% | 79 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | YKNSE | 51% | 72 |
| #9 | z | 49% | 132 |
| #10 | Swoffmiester | 48% | 89 |
| #11 | obiiking | 45% | 40 |
| #12 | mandu | 44% | 25 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | z | 23 | 0.0081 |
| #2 | Donkey (drop me the awp) | 22 | 0.0127 |
| #3 | Exzotikk(LFT) | 15 | 0.0090 |
| #4 | flairr | 13 | 0.0120 |
| #5 | YKNSE | 8 | 0.0051 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | z | 467 | 0.16 | 11 min |
| #2 | Donkey (drop me the awp) | 441 | 0.26 | 11 min |
| #3 | YKNSE | 412 | 0.26 | 9 min |
| #4 | Swoffmiester | 283 | 0.15 | 7 min |
| #5 | Exzotikk(LFT) | 217 | 0.13 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | yeji | +2.52 | 90 | 60 |
| #2 | oomi | +1.66 | 85 | 54 |
| #3 | MasterAce <3 | +1.51 | 79 | 54 |
| #4 | Swoffmiester | +1.05 | 70 | 62 |
| #5 | Donkey (drop me the awp) | +0.77 | 66 | 72 |





