








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 374 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wingman | 122 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 42 matches | ||
| Premier | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 9 matches | ||
| Faceit | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 10 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2908 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,353 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1761 | 28% |
| Smokes | 1909 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 1000 | 16% |
| Molotovs | 1683 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $821,989 of utility $156 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 336 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | treky | 61% | 76 |
| #2 | GingaNinja | 59% | 44 |
| #3 | Iko | 56% | 36 |
| #4 | jumpi^x2 | 53% | 102 |
| #5 | tk | 50% | 143 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | tk | 6 | 0.0022 |
| #2 | Alamedin | 6 | 0.0025 |
| #3 | Sam le Slick Slime | 3 | 0.0015 |
| #4 | jumpi^x2 | 2 | 0.0010 |
| #5 | trekmann bottom text | 2 | 0.0013 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | tk | 385 | 0.14 | 11 min |
| #2 | jumpi^x2 | 344 | 0.17 | 9 min |
| #3 | Alamedin | 269 | 0.11 | 6 min |
| #4 | Iko | 218 | 0.32 | 6 min |
| #5 | Vexas | 152 | 0.17 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | pauljs | +4.76 | 95 | 52 |
| #2 | jumpi^x2 | +2.29 | 92 | 56 |
| #3 | Iko | +2.04 | 74 | 63 |
| #4 | Vexas | +1.35 | 86 | 49 |
| #5 | treky | +0.68 | 84 | 41 |





