








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 213 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 73 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 6 matches | ||
| Wingman | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 31 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




18 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2259 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,032 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2630 | 37% |
| Smokes | 1332 | 19% |
| HE Grenades | 2270 | 32% |
| Molotovs | 800 | 11% |
Our logs show you have wasted $542,011 of utility $106 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 540 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | KennyAss | 44% | 16 |
| #6 | McNutzz | 43% | 106 |
| #7 | roma | 41% | 124 |
| #8 | Grizzlee | 38% | 98 |
| #9 | dwubsly | 31% | 64 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | McNutzz | 10 | 0.0047 |
| #2 | roma | 9 | 0.0037 |
| #3 | Burger | 8 | 0.0123 |
| #4 | 𝔹𝕦𝕟𝕘𝕖𝕣 🅼 | 7 | 0.0069 |
| #5 | Grizzlee | 3 | 0.0015 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | roma | 324 | 0.13 | 10 min |
| #2 | 𝔹𝕦𝕟𝕘𝕖𝕣 🅼 | 247 | 0.24 | 6 min |
| #3 | Burger | 221 | 0.34 | 6 min |
| #4 | dwubsly | 162 | 0.13 | 3 min |
| #5 | McNutzz | 140 | 0.07 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sherp3Billion | +1.45 | 60 | 58 |
| #2 | zerioN- | +1.13 | 83 | 52 |
| #3 | Burger | +0.82 | 68 | 62 |
| #4 | KennyAss | +0.26 | 40 | 59 |
| #5 | roma | +0.21 | 92 | 62 |





