








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 661 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 96 matches | ||
| Faceit | 34 matches | ||
| Wingman | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 36 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




21 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2640 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,885 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3766 | 35% |
| Smokes | 2790 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 2075 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 2254 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,080,840 of utility $189 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 231 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | Jahi | 54% | 80 |
| #10 | Pekzuu | 53% | 126 |
| #11 | Rahka | 50% | 16 |
| #12 | Ampan pizza | 49% | 37 |
| #13 | Ismo | 45% | 22 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pekzuu | 11 | 0.0044 |
| #2 | Red Cat | 6 | 0.0028 |
| #3 | Jahi | 5 | 0.0030 |
| #4 | paskabiceps | 5 | 0.0074 |
| #5 | NIQQI | 4 | 0.0062 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Red Cat | 494 | 0.23 | 13 min |
| #2 | Pekzuu | 380 | 0.15 | 9 min |
| #3 | Jahi | 357 | 0.22 | 9 min |
| #4 | ✞Kypäjyrä✞ | 329 | 0.23 | 9 min |
| #5 | -Sääski | 187 | 0.16 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✞Kypäjyrä✞ | +2.81 | 78 | 70 |
| #2 | Ismo | +1.83 | 77 | 75 |
| #3 | R L O T | +1.46 | 65 | 71 |
| #4 | NIQQI | +1.37 | 63 | 27 |
| #5 | Red Cat | +1.25 | 85 | 76 |





