








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 168 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 146 matches | ||
| Faceit | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 10 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2430 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,248 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1035 | 17% |
| Smokes | 1946 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 1520 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 1747 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $754,903 of utility $156 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 12 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | RouvaG | 66% | 44 |
| #2 | 賓士享受者 | 60% | 25 |
| #3 | vilzhuu👽 | 59% | 63 |
| #4 | sharkzer | 58% | 36 |
| #5 | MrJonsu | 53% | 106 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | vilzhuu👽 | 5 | 0.0037 |
| #2 | Stenu | 4 | 0.0037 |
| #3 | 賓士享受者 | 3 | 0.0058 |
| #4 | MrJonsu | 2 | 0.0009 |
| #5 | SeneX | 2 | 0.0011 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | RouvaG | 239 | 0.26 | 7 min |
| #2 | MrJonsu | 233 | 0.10 | 6 min |
| #3 | SeneX | 204 | 0.11 | 5 min |
| #4 | sharkzer | 197 | 0.27 | 6 min |
| #5 | Stenu | 194 | 0.18 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | vilzhuu👽 | +1.94 | 82 | 59 |
| #2 | ACC3S | +1.27 | 85 | 59 |
| #3 | draX | +1.25 | 80 | 71 |
| #4 | minttukossu | +0.80 | 84 | 66 |
| #5 | RouvaG | +0.75 | 70 | 76 |





