








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 390 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Mirage | 68 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 62 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 52 matches | ||
| Premier | 51 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 8 matches | ||
| Wingman | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Faceit | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 56 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




16 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2210 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,747 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1217 | 21% |
| Smokes | 1528 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 1814 | 32% |
| Molotovs | 1188 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,543,995 of utility $215 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 62 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ⫍ ⃢ ⫎ | 53% | 36 |
| #2 | Tomppeliib | 52% | 62 |
| #3 | Jonesii | 50% | 76 |
| #4 | Rambo-Maistelija | 47% | 19 |
| #5 | skidimiska | 46% | 24 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #12 | JonesBigassTruckRental&Storage | 36% | 69 |
| #13 | Whiff | 35% | 34 |
| #14 | Zyratin | 34% | 38 |
| #15 | mikkiz | 32% | 25 |
| #16 | Luikku | 32% | 25 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Eskon putiikki | 35 | 0.0281 |
| #2 | ⫍ ⃢ ⫎ | 15 | 0.0213 |
| #3 | mikkiz | 13 | 0.0249 |
| #4 | neitsyt jartsa | 5 | 0.0028 |
| #5 | Jonesii | 5 | 0.0033 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tomppeliib | 544 | 0.46 | 14 min |
| #2 | Eskon putiikki | 338 | 0.27 | 8 min |
| #3 | nono | 307 | 0.19 | 8 min |
| #4 | neitsyt jartsa | 274 | 0.15 | 5 min |
| #5 | ⫍ ⃢ ⫎ | 151 | 0.21 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tomppeliib | +4.40 | 69 | 79 |
| #2 | Eskon putiikki | +3.66 | 84 | 67 |
| #3 | Jonesii | +3.45 | 62 | 53 |
| #4 | Zyratin | +3.29 | 66 | 65 |
| #5 | mikkiz | +2.55 | 59 | 69 |





