










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 0 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.

| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 128 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Faceit | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 37 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




14 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1573 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,375 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1531 | 35% |
| Smokes | 1097 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 657 | 15% |
| Molotovs | 1090 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $640,681 of utility $182 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 728 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | cotamarshalio | 81% | 16 |
| #2 | camões | 73% | 11 |
| #3 | Raki | 73% | 11 |
| #4 | sd | 70% | 10 |
| #5 | Saladin Shaun | 69% | 16 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | Super Formal | 56% | 16 |
| #9 | " 08 " | 55% | 20 |
| #10 | Scofield | 55% | 64 |
| #11 | MigaZz | 45% | 11 |
| #12 | TIAKO | 36% | 14 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | puga pulicia | 11 | 0.0138 |
| #2 | Scofield | 9 | 0.0065 |
| #3 | " 08 " | 3 | 0.0076 |
| #4 | sd | 2 | 0.0088 |
| #5 | Raki | 2 | 0.0098 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | puga pulicia | 147 | 0.18 | 3 min |
| #2 | Scofield | 102 | 0.07 | 3 min |
| #3 | " 08 " | 58 | 0.15 | 2 min |
| #4 | Saladin Shaun | 52 | 0.16 | 1 min |
| #5 | MigaZz | 49 | 0.21 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | yanilmaz peek | +3.34 | 85 | 62 |
| #2 | MigaZz | +2.98 | 72 | 74 |
| #3 | Pac | +2.33 | 67 | 60 |
| #4 | camões | +0.44 | 79 | 64 |
| #5 | Scofield | +0.11 | 50 | 60 |





