








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 172 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 32 matches | ||
| Premier | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 9 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 8 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
979 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,209 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 671 | 30% |
| Smokes | 585 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 495 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 458 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $453,092 of utility $195 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 28 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | pewpew | 67% | 6 |
| #4 | sh4rkz | 60% | 55 |
| #5 | Tore | 57% | 7 |
| #6 | Nilsen | 50% | 6 |
| #7 | Shipper | 43% | 7 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | pewpew | 2 | 0.0185 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Nilsen | +2.60 | 69 | 55 |
| #2 | Magelaus | +2.36 | 71 | 55 |
| #3 | sh4rkz | +1.37 | 57 | 72 |
| #4 | Tore | +1.33 | 79 | 86 |
| #5 | Pleblex | +0.53 | 71 | 53 |





