








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 123 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 153 matches | ||
| Wingman | 16 matches | ||
| Faceit | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2170 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,431 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1736 | 27% |
| Smokes | 1129 | 18% |
| HE Grenades | 2028 | 32% |
| Molotovs | 1538 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $526,553 of utility $110 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 455 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ZOPRANoO | 65% | 17 |
| #2 | Godypmu | 64% | 14 |
| #3 | kron1k | 55% | 60 |
| #4 | The_Proxist | 53% | 66 |
| #5 | TooM9 | 51% | 72 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | reigNyQ | 47% | 91 |
| #8 | screa | 44% | 39 |
| #9 | Marcyq | 41% | 17 |
| #10 | uNNNormal. | 35% | 26 |
| #11 | r0x | 33% | 24 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JONAZZZ | 12 | 0.0054 |
| #2 | reigNyQ | 11 | 0.0058 |
| #3 | TooM9 | 5 | 0.0032 |
| #4 | The_Proxist | 2 | 0.0014 |
| #5 | kron1k | 1 | 0.0008 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | reigNyQ | 331 | 0.17 | 8 min |
| #2 | JONAZZZ | 318 | 0.14 | 8 min |
| #3 | The_Proxist | 144 | 0.10 | 4 min |
| #4 | TooM9 | 110 | 0.07 | 3 min |
| #5 | kron1k | 83 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Godypmu | +1.89 | 82 | 66 |
| #2 | JONAZZZ | +1.67 | 87 | 56 |
| #3 | ZOPRANoO | +1.19 | 88 | 53 |
| #4 | screa | +1.06 | 85 | 51 |
| #5 | reigNyQ | +0.85 | 84 | 55 |





