








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 99 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 200 matches | ||
| Faceit | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 10 matches | ||
| Wingman | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 3 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




28 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3161 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,255 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2847 | 28% |
| Smokes | 2064 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 2982 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 2362 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $625,617 of utility $97 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 57 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Luii11Ölf called kfnnmpa <3 | 66% | 29 |
| #2 | Marcyq | 61% | 28 |
| #3 | Vinum | 56% | 41 |
| #4 | Bonghitter69 | 51% | 35 |
| #5 | The_Proxist | 50% | 128 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | r0x | 49% | 63 |
| #10 | screa | 49% | 86 |
| #11 | Beatneck | 47% | 91 |
| #12 | Godypmu | 46% | 41 |
| #13 | uNNNormal. | 44% | 43 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JONAZZZ | 24 | 0.0060 |
| #2 | The_Proxist | 6 | 0.0022 |
| #3 | Godypmu | 5 | 0.0056 |
| #4 | screa | 4 | 0.0024 |
| #5 | kron1k | 3 | 0.0012 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JONAZZZ | 521 | 0.13 | 11 min |
| #2 | The_Proxist | 266 | 0.10 | 7 min |
| #3 | Beatneck | 201 | 0.11 | 5 min |
| #4 | screa | 150 | 0.09 | 5 min |
| #5 | Godypmu | 146 | 0.16 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Godypmu | +1.80 | 83 | 67 |
| #2 | Marcyq | +1.76 | 76 | 64 |
| #3 | Vinum | +1.24 | 78 | 65 |
| #4 | JONAZZZ | +0.98 | 88 | 54 |
| #5 | reigNyQ | +0.70 | 85 | 58 |





