








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 653 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 113 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Faceit | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 16 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1607 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,032 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1851 | 26% |
| Smokes | 1566 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 1949 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 1666 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $522,427 of utility $157 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 99 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Teras | 62% | 21 |
| #2 | FunnyTurtles12 | 60% | 20 |
| #3 | ----TMR---- | 57% | 75 |
| #4 | <OoloO> | 57% | 28 |
| #5 | Krõbe Pee90n | 56% | 34 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | Tutten | 50% | 12 |
| #10 | HopelessMango | 48% | 21 |
| #11 | Swonkles | 46% | 13 |
| #12 | Mr. Luik .★. | 40% | 10 |
| #13 | Wolf Black | 38% | 13 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Indigowizdom | 3 | 0.0040 |
| #2 | FunnyTurtles12 | 2 | 0.0045 |
| #3 | Tutten | 2 | 0.0081 |
| #4 | ----TMR---- | 1 | 0.0007 |
| #5 | Krõbe Pee90n | 1 | 0.0015 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ----TMR---- | 150 | 0.10 | 4 min |
| #2 | Indigowizdom | 129 | 0.17 | 4 min |
| #3 | 01000111 | 93 | 0.15 | 3 min |
| #4 | PvE Player | 82 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| #5 | Krõbe Pee90n | 74 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Swonkles | +2.93 | 79 | 60 |
| #2 | FunnyTurtles12 | +1.93 | 60 | 55 |
| #3 | Teras | +1.77 | 88 | 56 |
| #4 | ----TMR---- | +1.27 | 67 | 63 |
| #5 | PvE Player | +0.99 | 54 | 70 |





