








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 343 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 92 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 10 matches | ||
| Premier | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 10 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




13 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2008 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,107 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1685 | 28% |
| Smokes | 1887 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 888 | 15% |
| Molotovs | 1647 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $404,210 of utility $125 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 270 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | clx | 60% | 30 |
| #7 | LittleBEER | 58% | 12 |
| #8 | Awsome | 44% | 9 |
| #9 | cmrn | 44% | 18 |
| #10 | ghost_solder556 | 40% | 15 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | vin3 | 4 | 0.0043 |
| #2 | clx | 2 | 0.0033 |
| #3 | LittleBEER | 2 | 0.0081 |
| #4 | neight | 1 | 0.0007 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | neight | 255 | 0.18 | 6 min |
| #2 | clx | 162 | 0.26 | 4 min |
| #3 | vin3 | 132 | 0.14 | 4 min |
| #4 | bones | 96 | 0.12 | 3 min |
| #5 | Awsome | 57 | 0.27 | 1 min |





