








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 569 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Mirage | 81 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 71 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 65 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 63 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 61 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 59 matches | ||
| Faceit | 38 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 19 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 16 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




13 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6052 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 20,583 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5585 | 27% |
| Smokes | 6078 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 4772 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 4148 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,141,884 of utility $110 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 460 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | Yes!Yes! | 58% | 161 |
| #7 | 80 Nuggets | 52% | 267 |
| #8 | Jimmy | 51% | 297 |
| #9 | dumbo | 50% | 204 |
| #10 | roxo | 48% | 48 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | emt | 1570 | 0.18 | 36 min |
| #2 | Jimmy | 574 | 0.10 | 15 min |
| #3 | dumbo | 535 | 0.13 | 11 min |
| #4 | Yes!Yes! | 531 | 0.16 | 13 min |
| #5 | hiyah | 480 | 0.14 | 10 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | p0keyy | +3.77 | 80 | 72 |
| #2 | roxo | +3.76 | 90 | 68 |
| #3 | Yes!Yes! | +2.44 | 75 | 65 |
| #4 | emt | +1.66 | 71 | 66 |
| #5 | Valene | -0.01 | 46 | 63 |





