








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 15 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 56 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Faceit | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1218 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,212 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1098 | 34% |
| Smokes | 586 | 18% |
| HE Grenades | 931 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 597 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $242,649 of utility $108 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | w4RG4 | 57% | 44 |
| #2 | Skip... | 52% | 82 |
| #3 | Vuranusember29 | 50% | 16 |
| #4 | Flekkeny | 47% | 79 |
| #5 | globee | 45% | 22 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | globee | 45% | 22 |
| #6 | Riflahh | 44% | 25 |
| #7 | smrtrfszm | 43% | 7 |
| #8 | AteszTelibever | 43% | 7 |
| #9 | StraYzie | 33% | 12 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Flekkeny | 7 | 0.0044 |
| #2 | w4RG4 | 5 | 0.0057 |
| #3 | Skip... | 2 | 0.0012 |
| #4 | Riflahh | 2 | 0.0037 |
| #5 | globee | 2 | 0.0042 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Flekkeny | 225 | 0.14 | 6 min |
| #2 | Skip... | 221 | 0.13 | 5 min |
| #3 | w4RG4 | 131 | 0.15 | 4 min |
| #4 | Riflahh | 83 | 0.15 | 3 min |
| #5 | globee | 47 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Skip... | +2.51 | 84 | 65 |
| #2 | Riflahh | +1.04 | 81 | 77 |
| #3 | w4RG4 | +0.86 | 77 | 76 |
| #4 | Miccs | +0.24 | 78 | 56 |
| #5 | globee | -0.30 | 82 | 59 |





