








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 504 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 48 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 14 matches | ||
| Wingman | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 94 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




27 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1488 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,564 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 904 | 25% |
| Smokes | 364 | 10% |
| HE Grenades | 1735 | 49% |
| Molotovs | 561 | 16% |
Our logs show you have wasted $510,463 of utility $124 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 327 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | алый | 6 | 0.0052 |
| #2 | cat | 5 | 0.0026 |
| #3 | Darko Lazic | 4 | 0.0034 |
| #4 | Bezwzględny | 3 | 0.0014 |
| #5 | Svirlica | 2 | 0.0052 |





