








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 299 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 85 matches | ||
| Faceit | 51 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 19 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2016 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,886 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1188 | 20% |
| Smokes | 1527 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 1438 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 1733 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $818,742 of utility $171 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 398 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #15 | HUNA | 44% | 50 |
| #16 | Domas | 42% | 19 |
| #17 | Munnbag | 42% | 19 |
| #18 | niko | 37% | 19 |
| #19 | bVI | 30% | 20 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | choppers | 8 | 0.0030 |
| #2 | Domas | 4 | 0.0110 |
| #3 | booth | 2 | 0.0019 |
| #4 | OPJames | 2 | 0.0027 |
| #5 | Pogo | 2 | 0.0033 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | choppers | 385 | 0.15 | 10 min |
| #2 | HARRIS [PMA] | 292 | 0.27 | 8 min |
| #3 | booth | 186 | 0.17 | 4 min |
| #4 | HUNA | 164 | 0.15 | 3 min |
| #5 | Classix | 116 | 0.26 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Domas | +5.13 | 69 | 64 |
| #2 | hej | +3.89 | 69 | 63 |
| #3 | umer | +2.60 | 87 | 66 |
| #4 | OPJames | +2.32 | 84 | 70 |
| #5 | Hyde | +1.74 | 47 | 65 |





