








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 90 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 45 matches | ||
| Premier | 33 matches | ||
| Wingman | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Renown | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 19 different maps





Our logs show 17 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




17 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1523 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,953 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1360 | 27% |
| Smokes | 1375 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 1213 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 1005 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $666,284 of utility $176 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 8 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ron Wasili | 60% | 10 |
| #2 | marc1v | 59% | 74 |
| #3 | flash | 57% | 80 |
| #4 | MKroenke | 53% | 140 |
| #5 | timfu | 50% | 44 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | marc1v | 59% | 74 |
| #3 | flash | 57% | 80 |
| #4 | MKroenke | 53% | 140 |
| #5 | timfu | 50% | 44 |
| #6 | Ryoiki tenkai | 50% | 141 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MKroenke | 5 | 0.0018 |
| #2 | Ryoiki tenkai | 1 | 0.0004 |
| #3 | timfu | 1 | 0.0013 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ryoiki tenkai | 137 | 0.05 | 4 min |
| #2 | flash | 126 | 0.07 | 3 min |
| #3 | marc1v | 76 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| #4 | MKroenke | 41 | 0.02 | 1 min |
| #5 | Ron Wasili | 24 | 0.15 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MKroenke | +2.14 | 79 | 45 |
| #2 | marc1v | +0.96 | 76 | 54 |
| #3 | WheyMysterio | +0.44 | 65 | 59 |
| #4 | flash | -0.47 | 71 | 53 |
| #5 | Ryoiki tenkai | -2.67 | 52 | 57 |





