








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 497 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 16 matches | ||
| Wingman | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 7 matches | ||
| Faceit | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 20 different maps





Our logs show 19 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




12 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3491 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,118 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1071 | 13% |
| Smokes | 2798 | 34% |
| HE Grenades | 2258 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 1991 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,000,305 of utility $150 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 37 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | yb better 69 | 51% | 135 |
| #2 | BIDENISCREEPY | 51% | 81 |
| #3 | lu02 | 50% | 22 |
| #4 | gb | 44% | 18 |
| #5 | jas | 44% | 43 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | yb better 69 | 51% | 135 |
| #2 | BIDENISCREEPY | 51% | 81 |
| #3 | lu02 | 50% | 22 |
| #4 | gb | 44% | 18 |
| #5 | jas | 44% | 43 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | yb better 69 | 15 | 0.0055 |
| #2 | BIDENISCREEPY | 9 | 0.0053 |
| #3 | jas | 3 | 0.0034 |
| #4 | lu02 | 3 | 0.0071 |
| #5 | gb | 2 | 0.0053 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | yb better 69 | 301 | 0.11 | 7 min |
| #2 | BIDENISCREEPY | 185 | 0.11 | 4 min |
| #3 | jas | 50 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| #4 | lu02 | 44 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| #5 | gb | 19 | 0.05 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | yb better 69 | +2.42 | 71 | 57 |
| #2 | lu02 | +2.15 | 95 | 54 |
| #3 | BIDENISCREEPY | +1.94 | 73 | 64 |
| #4 | gb | +0.88 | 68 | 42 |
| #5 | ✪J8kE. | +0.39 | 76 | 47 |





