








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 111 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 227 matches | ||
| Faceit | 9 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 37 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




10 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3106 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,328 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3084 | 25% |
| Smokes | 3747 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 3288 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 2209 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $528,328 of utility $88 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 171 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Gazzaboy19 | 63% | 67 |
| #2 | spikecustard | 62% | 21 |
| #3 | Mazza | 59% | 22 |
| #4 | Pingu | 52% | 27 |
| #5 | Quzyvoid | 51% | 164 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Pingu | 52% | 27 |
| #5 | Quzyvoid | 51% | 164 |
| #6 | Syrup | 51% | 110 |
| #7 | Loomzin | 45% | 29 |
| #8 | Yer Da | 34% | 29 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Quzyvoid | 6 | 0.0017 |
| #2 | Gazzaboy19 | 4 | 0.0027 |
| #3 | Mazza | 2 | 0.0041 |
| #4 | Loomzin | 1 | 0.0016 |
| #5 | Yer Da | 1 | 0.0016 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Quzyvoid | 527 | 0.15 | 15 min |
| #2 | Syrup | 172 | 0.07 | 4 min |
| #3 | Pingu | 98 | 0.18 | 2 min |
| #4 | Gazzaboy19 | 93 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| #5 | Yer Da | 93 | 0.15 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Wiisteve2000 | +2.82 | 66 | 71 |
| #2 | Mazza | +0.09 | 41 | 14 |
| #3 | spikecustard | +0.03 | 69 | 60 |
| #4 | Gazzaboy19 | -0.00 | 58 | 59 |
| #5 | Loomzin | -0.97 | 58 | 45 |





