








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 423 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 266 matches | ||
| Faceit | 62 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 24 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




46 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3412 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,738 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2345 | 20% |
| Smokes | 2985 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 2492 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 3916 | 33% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,423,112 of utility $148 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 322 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 乃丨尺乃 | 30 | 0.0094 |
| #2 | Ramfu | 27 | 0.0039 |
| #3 | Type2Diabetes | 17 | 0.0120 |
| #4 | Wiglum | 7 | 0.0041 |
| #5 | Assemb1ly | 4 | 0.0038 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ramfu | 801 | 0.11 | 20 min |
| #2 | Assemb1ly | 241 | 0.23 | 6 min |
| #3 | 乃丨尺乃 | 184 | 0.06 | 5 min |
| #4 | AltFreaky | 177 | 0.27 | 4 min |
| #5 | Geeked Steven | 122 | 0.13 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | AltFreaky | +4.48 | 76 | 76 |
| #2 | Assemb1ly | +2.59 | 72 | 58 |
| #3 | 乃丨尺乃 | +2.10 | 71 | 29 |
| #4 | Ramfu | +1.41 | 56 | 57 |
| #5 | Geeked Steven | -0.35 | 61 | 44 |





