








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 170 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 162 matches | ||
| Premier | 4 matches | ||
| Renown | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2273 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,647 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2472 | 29% |
| Smokes | 2210 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 1843 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 2122 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $409,552 of utility $91 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 699 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | leekb0b | 64% | 14 |
| #2 | Lozenger | 劳伦斯 | 54% | 26 |
| #3 | Asian kid | 48% | 21 |
| #4 | zurrp | 46% | 46 |
| #5 | Kanny | 41% | 71 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Asian kid | 48% | 21 |
| #4 | zurrp | 46% | 46 |
| #5 | Kanny | 41% | 71 |
| #6 | lyons | 38% | 13 |
| #7 | ✪ Heroic🎃 | 36% | 42 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | zurrp | 3 | 0.0029 |
| #2 | Asian kid | 3 | 0.0069 |
| #3 | ✪ Heroic🎃 | 2 | 0.0024 |
| #4 | Kanny | 1 | 0.0007 |
| #5 | Lozenger | 劳伦斯 | 1 | 0.0020 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kanny | 328 | 0.23 | 10 min |
| #2 | zurrp | 184 | 0.18 | 6 min |
| #3 | Lozenger | 劳伦斯 | 89 | 0.18 | 3 min |
| #4 | ✪ Heroic🎃 | 84 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| #5 | lyons | 46 | 0.16 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lozenger | 劳伦斯 | +1.91 | 84 | 64 |
| #2 | zurrp | +1.53 | 83 | 70 |
| #3 | Asian kid | +0.88 | 80 | 41 |
| #4 | 1ARMgod | +0.46 | 83 | 66 |
| #5 | leekb0b | +0.43 | 75 | 45 |





