








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 107 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 177 matches | ||
| Wingman | 11 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 3 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1791 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,725 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1953 | 25% |
| Smokes | 1996 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 1999 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 1777 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $429,658 of utility $102 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 93 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #10 | YeezyOG | 50% | 12 |
| #11 | 1ARMgod | 36% | 42 |
| #12 | Kanny | 35% | 20 |
| #13 | Asian kid | 30% | 10 |
| #14 | zurrp | 27% | 15 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 1ARMgod | 4 | 0.0048 |
| #2 | zurrp | 3 | 0.0100 |
| #3 | Asian kid | 3 | 0.0161 |
| #4 | maniaczinho | 1 | 0.0030 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | maniaczinho | 128 | 0.38 | 4 min |
| #2 | Kanny | 123 | 0.33 | 3 min |
| #3 | 1ARMgod | 120 | 0.14 | 4 min |
| #4 | p0nz | 90 | 0.27 | 3 min |
| #5 | D2Kester | 80 | 0.21 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Brucey |:) | +4.24 | 91 | 59 |
| #2 | maniaczinho | +4.14 | 89 | 77 |
| #3 | Roobz | +2.66 | 85 | 52 |
| #4 | zurrp | +1.09 | 86 | 73 |
| #5 | YeezyOG | +1.00 | 71 | 69 |





