








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 189 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 106 matches | ||
| Faceit | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 24 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2186 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,942 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1544 | 26% |
| Smokes | 1545 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 1498 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 1355 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $511,738 of utility $125 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 142 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | FjallaGyðingurツ™ | 61% | 18 |
| #2 | Dónakarl | 61% | 28 |
| #3 | Aprikosa | 57% | 14 |
| #4 | Orrz | 50% | 10 |
| #5 | Aron Olafs*** | 50% | 22 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Aprikosa | 57% | 14 |
| #4 | Orrz | 50% | 10 |
| #5 | Aron Olafs*** | 50% | 22 |
| #6 | Player1 | 49% | 41 |
| #7 | bjoerntastic | 33% | 12 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Player1 | 2 | 0.0023 |
| #2 | Aron Olafs*** | 2 | 0.0043 |
| #3 | bjoerntastic | 2 | 0.0082 |
| #4 | Dónakarl | 1 | 0.0016 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Player1 | 122 | 0.14 | 2 min |
| #2 | Dónakarl | 108 | 0.18 | 3 min |
| #3 | Aron Olafs*** | 91 | 0.20 | 2 min |
| #4 | FjallaGyðingurツ™ | 65 | 0.16 | 2 min |
| #5 | Aprikosa | 49 | 0.15 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | golee^ | +2.10 | 74 | 61 |
| #2 | FjallaGyðingurツ™ | +1.45 | 67 | 69 |
| #3 | Player1 | +0.49 | 71 | 55 |
| #4 | Aprikosa | +0.48 | 58 | 64 |
| #5 | Dónakarl | -0.30 | 41 | 75 |





