








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 85 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 7 matches | ||
| Faceit | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 3 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




13 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1020 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,254 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 534 | 24% |
| Smokes | 458 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 747 | 33% |
| Molotovs | 515 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $539,272 of utility $230 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 78 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | k0rEaNaCh0 | 78% | 9 |
| #2 | schwasted | 67% | 6 |
| #3 | Steph The Beasty | 55% | 22 |
| #4 | Starlene | 53% | 60 |
| #5 | Dylan :) | 50% | 10 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Starlene | 5 | 0.0041 |
| #2 | Anszel | 2 | 0.0017 |
| #3 | Maybe: Zac | 2 | 0.0031 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Anszel | 233 | 0.20 | 6 min |
| #2 | Starlene | 194 | 0.16 | 4 min |
| #3 | Maybe: Zac | 74 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| #4 | Sunxer | 50 | 0.33 | 1 min |
| #5 | k0rEaNaCh0 | 48 | 0.24 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | k0rEaNaCh0 | +5.12 | 85 | 72 |
| #2 | Sunxer | +2.65 | 56 | 54 |
| #3 | Starlene | +1.20 | 69 | 56 |
| #4 | nemo | +0.84 | 48 | 70 |
| #5 | Maybe: Zac | +0.69 | 71 | 67 |





