








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 682 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 485 matches | ||
| Faceit | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 7 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 74 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




24 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6084 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 23,790 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 7811 | 33% |
| Smokes | 5724 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 5437 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 4818 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $910,085 of utility $70 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 349 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Alive | 12 | 0.0020 |
| #2 | Zyzzy | 10 | 0.0014 |
| #3 | QwestaG | 8 | 0.0017 |
| #4 | Kelevra | 6 | 0.0033 |
| #5 | Mr|RED | 6 | 0.0037 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Zyzzy | 1198 | 0.17 | 37 min |
| #2 | Alive | 1193 | 0.20 | 27 min |
| #3 | QwestaG | 1150 | 0.24 | 27 min |
| #4 | meph | 573 | 0.27 | 15 min |
| #5 | Mr|RED | 316 | 0.20 | 8 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Zyzzy | +2.51 | 85 | 68 |
| #2 | Young Dedushka | +1.75 | 82 | 64 |
| #3 | meph | -0.41 | 50 | 56 |
| #4 | Alive | -0.56 | 67 | 70 |
| #5 | Nodji | -0.83 | 70 | 71 |





