








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 512 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 116 matches | ||
| Wingman | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




10 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1770 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,260 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1685 | 23% |
| Smokes | 1616 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 2140 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 1819 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $498,466 of utility $124 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 33 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ♛N3mo♛ | 55% | 51 |
| #2 | blockerdk | 55% | 44 |
| #3 | GraffitiKing | 51% | 35 |
| #4 | Mr. Puss | 45% | 29 |
| #5 | PUF | 44% | 84 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | WiKKiD | 43% | 93 |
| #7 | \ Emilkfp / | 41% | 109 |
| #8 | Mr. Pineapple | 39% | 51 |
| #9 | JT | 33% | 30 |
| #10 | AK ✈ | 29% | 17 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ♛N3mo♛ | 10 | 0.0097 |
| #2 | \ Emilkfp / | 8 | 0.0035 |
| #3 | WiKKiD | 4 | 0.0020 |
| #4 | Mr. Pineapple | 1 | 0.0010 |
| #5 | GraffitiKing | 1 | 0.0014 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | \ Emilkfp / | 188 | 0.08 | 5 min |
| #2 | WiKKiD | 127 | 0.06 | 3 min |
| #3 | ♛N3mo♛ | 110 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| #4 | PUF | 105 | 0.07 | 3 min |
| #5 | blockerdk | 41 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ♛N3mo♛ | +3.88 | 86 | 45 |
| #2 | Mr. Puss | +2.87 | 61 | 61 |
| #3 | BeaZt | +0.79 | 60 | 60 |
| #4 | WiKKiD | +0.71 | 52 | 54 |
| #5 | AK ✈ | +0.27 | 67 | 28 |





