








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 765 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 316 matches | ||
| Faceit | 69 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 4 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 42 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




25 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5001 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,977 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5153 | 37% |
| Smokes | 3479 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 2022 | 14% |
| Molotovs | 3323 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,179,316 of utility $192 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 299 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JustCallMeMatt | 71% | 31 |
| #2 | Bnanman | 58% | 33 |
| #3 | Vanth | 57% | 37 |
| #4 | ChrisFD | 53% | 128 |
| #5 | Ven0m | 53% | 53 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Ven0m | 53% | 53 |
| #6 | Sky | 51% | 45 |
| #7 | Sir_WaterBear | 49% | 43 |
| #8 | Kols | 48% | 52 |
| #9 | Sisar | 48% | 40 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ChrisFD | 8 | 0.0030 |
| #2 | Sky | 4 | 0.0042 |
| #3 | Ven0m | 3 | 0.0026 |
| #4 | Bnanman | 3 | 0.0044 |
| #5 | Kols | 2 | 0.0019 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ven0m | 278 | 0.24 | 7 min |
| #2 | Sir_WaterBear | 132 | 0.14 | 4 min |
| #3 | Bnanman | 118 | 0.17 | 3 min |
| #4 | Vanth | 111 | 0.14 | 3 min |
| #5 | Sky | 106 | 0.11 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sky | +2.93 | 90 | 51 |
| #2 | Bnanman | +2.37 | 69 | 69 |
| #3 | Sir_WaterBear | +2.34 | 81 | 60 |
| #4 | Ven0m | +2.20 | 65 | 69 |
| #5 | Sisar | +1.75 | 69 | 58 |





